Live an Inspired Life

Photo by Khanh Le on Pexels.com

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. It’s about creating yourself.”

It’s all about creating! The world, life, all of it, is about creating. Everything begins and ends with creativity and creation. An idea becomes something physical. A car, a desk, a vacation, a family, a painting, and a better me living an inspired life. They all are first an idea (mental creation) and then they become something physically present (physical creation).

In the fall of 2021, almost 5 years after I stated this website, I turned 60. That December 31, I retired from a full time professional career that spanned 39 years and included two college degrees. I walked away from 50-hour weeks (sometimes 60-hours), a lot of time spent in my car, on the road, or in an airport, or on a plane, or in a rental car, a different city or town 4 days a week, and a six-figure income. It was a bittersweet decision which was preceded by a lot of thinking. And I mean A LOT! And honestly, in hindsight, way too much thinking.

Looking back now, it should have been a simple decision, but we all know simple does not translate into easy. That career, highly demanding work and grueling schedule served a lot of people and organizations, but not me. I was helping a lot of people create a pathway to their desired results, but I wasn’t creating the results I wanted and needed.

After 39 years of professional work and 36 years of parenting four children to adulthood, I decided it was time to put MY personal results as the highest priority in my life on a daily, weekly, monthly and annual basis. So for the past 15 months I’ve been focused on (re)creating who I want to be, which is why today’s quote resonated deeply.

I want to use writing as the vehicle for sharing what/who I am creating ~ my why, my how and my results. I love writing and always have. (See my first post on my site, 6 years ago!) It’s something that comes easily to me and I believe writing is the gateway to a happier, healthier, more creative self. I know that neuroscience shows the positive impact the act of writing has on the human brain and mind. I also know there are hundreds (probably more like millions) of stories of how writing has changed lives.

The one example that always stands out for me is the story of Erin Gruwell. Erin was a young teacher at Woodrow Wilson HS in Long Beach, CA, in 1994. Through writing she inspired hundreds of students to create a better and different life. Their story was documented in the 2007 film, “Freedom Writers”. The impact writing had for them was immeasurable. Writing makes a difference. It helps us create.

Additionally, I love quotes. They are how I surround myself with others’ brilliance. They are how I ‘get better’. So every blog post will be inspired by a quote that contributes to my creating. My end in mind is to share my story, my learning, connections and ideas in the hope that small pieces will resonate with you, the reader, and you find a ‘take home’ take-away that makes today a little better. Because, that’s what I am focused on creating ~ a little bit better me every single day. I hope you’ll follow along as I share my why, my how, and my results of this journey in creating a better, happier, healthier version of me.

Thank you for stopping by and spending some of your precious time and energy to read my post today. I appreciate you and wish you kind and simple moments. Until next week…. Live an inspired life!

The True Thief of Joy

“True simplicity is about bringing order to complexity.”

Sir Jony Ive, Apple’s Design Wizard

“The beauty of truth is its complexity.” ~Unknown

Life is complex and complicated. It’s the human condition. It is apparent to me that it was designed to be this way. Living life as a human being has always been about pain, struggle, problem-solving and decision-making. Survival of each hour, day, week, etc., depends upon one’s ability to figure out the complexity so that the pain is minimal, the struggle is manageable, the problems are solvable, and choices result in the most desirable outcomes.

About 6 years ago, a friend shared with me a year-long online course for which she had signed up. I took a look and decided it was a great idea and would be fun. I bought the course and became a paying member of a community that has inspired me forward ever since. The name of the course was “Simple Year” and the architect was Courtney Carver. Courtney and her genius can be found at http://www.bemorewithless.com. The purpose and defined outcomes for “Simple Year” resonated with me and included ideas, activities and resources for learning how life could be more intentionally lived. There was an emphasis on simplicity. Each month, Courtney introduced us to a new voice and personality with ideas and insights for creating more intentionality and better results in a particular area of life. We dived deeply into areas such as finances, our home environment, schedules, health and wellness, travel, etc., et. al. The featured leaders of each monthly module varied and the year was kicked off in January with two friends, Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus, better known as The Minimalists.

One of the optional activities shared for the month, focusing on simplicity in our living spaces, was the Mins Game. I invited my husband to play and the two of us had a lot of fun that January. The Mins Game focuses on the strategy of decluttering as a means of achieving simplicity in your home by intentionally identifying and removing useless items that many of us accumulate over time. The result is intended to provide you with a home that feels calm and serves your family better. It was simple – and just a reminder, simple does not translate into easy – and I have to say the challenge also became a lot of fun! It produced much laughter and some great competition. It also resulted in a lot of donations and more cleared, calm space in our home.

The rules of the Mins game are simple. On January 1st – or whatever first day of the month you choose – you get rid of one item you no longer need, use or love. On the 2nd, you get rid of two more, on the 3rd day of the month, three more items must leave, and so on. You get the picture. The real fun begins around the 25th day of the month, especially when two of you are playing. And, yes, on January 31 of that year, we removed 62 items out of our house! (Just a hint, should you decide to play the game during spring cleaning in May, save your kitchen junk drawers for the last few days of the month. I’m pretty sure everyone can find 31 useless pens, or paper clips, or thumb tacks!) Actually, on January 31, we donated more than 62 DVD’s to our local library! Win-win!

When you add it up mathematically, it equals 496 items, each. That January we removed over 1,000 items. Some were sold, some were donated, and true junk was trashed.

We’ve played the Mins game twice and probably need to play a couple more times, now that our four ‘kids’ are grown adults.

That experience was 1/12 of the Simple Year course. It had a significant impact on my vision and mission for this new chapter. I liken it to a ‘mid-life detox’. It has also created my #2 Highest Priority ~ to live a life of simplicity and intentionality. Why? As author Gretchen Rubin says, “outer order, inner calm.” I value orderliness and inner calm. After 39 years of a highly demanding career, coupled with raising four children active in sports year round (35 of the 39 years), I am ready for the simplicity, the calm, and the empty spaces. It serves my heart, body, mind and soul well. It helps me to honor self first. As Rick Rubin says, so eloquently, in his new book, The Creative Act: A Way of Being, ‘make art that moves YOU.’ He says to think of the audience last. It’s brilliant wisdom and advice. Those are my why’s for choosing simplicity and intentionality as Priority #2. I call it “living by subtraction” ~ intentionally taking away, removing, and stopping the things that inadvertently steal our joy. Because the true thief of joy is excess. Less has truly given me more.

What can you take away, remove, and/or stop doing that would give you more? More calm, more solitude, more peace, more time, more money, love, health, joy….? Living by subtraction really adds up!

In next week’s post, I’ll delve into my ends in mind, my SMART goal aligned to support this priority, and the action steps I am taking to move me closer to ‘more’, my specifically defined outcomes.

Thank you for stopping by and spending some of your precious time and energy to read my post today. I appreciate you and wish you kind and simple moments. Live inspired!

The Importance of Congruence

“A healthy person has a thousand wishes; a sick person has only one.”

Agnes Karll-Schwest (Krankenpfleger), pioneering German nurse

Often most of us create, maintain and work from a ‘to do’ list. I’m so motivated by mine that I will even add, and then cross off, something I completed that wasn’t even on the list to begin with. If that makes you laugh, then you know!

A brilliant colleague of mine once asked us during a team meeting, when was the last time you referenced your ‘to be’ list? In other words, what is it you want to be each and every day? It was an insightful question to pose. The majority of us were surprised at the depth and value of this question. We admittedly had not recently consulted, or updated, our ‘to be’ lists. The activity went on to include time for considering what we wanted on our ‘to be’ list and then we continued to be enlightened with the idea that our ‘to do’ list should be reflective of our ‘to be’ list. If I want to be a patient person, then when I am on hold, or waiting in a long line at the grocery store, what is it I want to be doing? When we are living with congruence, our ‘being’ and ‘doing’ are aligned.

My highest priority for this chapter, #1 in importance, is achieving a very long, healthy lifespan. My why behind establishing this as my #1 is simply stated in the opening quote. Because it’s true.

Another reason for this being my #1 is because health is wealth. Good health is the foundation for creating everything else. When I am healthy, I am positioned to chase all my other dreams.

And lastly, my focus on optimal health is to achieve longevity. (The longest living human being was a French woman, Jeanne Louise Calment, who lived to be 122. She passed away in 1997. “I’ve waited 110 years to be famous. I count on taking advantage of it,” she quipped at her 120th birthday party.) I want to be Jeanne when I grow up. Why? It’s my most significant and meaningful reason. My youngest child, my only daughter, was born days before my 40th birthday. (We are both Libras. ;-)) She is 16 years younger, to the day, than my first born son. She once said to me, “it’s not fair that Adam will get to love you longer than me no matter what.” My heart sank with her 5-year old brilliance. I promised myself at that moment I would do everything in my power to be sure I will be here to celebrate her 60th birthday. That end in mind set my goal and created my personal mission to become a healthy, vibrant centenarian. Therefore, healthy longevity is my #1 highest priority and those are the why’s behind it.

I want to be a healthy, fit, vibrant human being for a really long time. So what needs to be on my ‘to do’ list that aligns to and supports this highest priority?

Once you have identified your priority and can articulate the why and values behind it, the next crucial step in bringing that vision (mental creation) to fruition (physical creation) is to be able to know when you have achieved progress. What will your measure of achievement look like, sound like and feel like? This is where a SMART or wildly important goal comes into play! This is where the fun begins! What do you want to get by focusing on this highest priority?

My #1 highest priority is healthy longevity to and beyond October, 2061. What do I need to achieve today, next week, this month, this year, in 5 years, and this decade in order to live in congruence? I’ve captured my progress benchmarks in tiny steps as well as larger, long-term goals using the SMART rubric for creating goals. My goals are all linked to the largest contributors to healthy longevity – what I eat, what I weigh (metabolic health), how often and how I move, my sleep habits, how I manage stress and with whom I connect emotionally on a regular basis. (“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”)

Every single one of those contributors are within my circle of control, which means I can do something about each one and I can influence their impact on my life and my health ~ heart, body, mind and soul.

One of my current goals relates to what I choose to eat, and avoid eating, and what I weigh. My SMART goal statement is: I will go from 156lbs to 129lbs by September 1, 2023. Why is this important? Because the research and science show, repeatedly, that people who maintain an optimal body weight with good metabolic health live longer and with markedly less chronic diseases. 129lbs is more optimal for my 5’3″ frame. 156lbs was considered medically overweight, which does not support my highest priority.

Once your goal is specifically stated, is measurable, attainable, realistic and time-bound, it’s time to get down to business and DO something that will move the needle. (What I do will determine what I get.) What do I need to do to move that needle from 156 to 129? After much research – reading many books, listening to countless podcasts, I landed on a few action steps I concentrate on each day and track on my daily/weekly calendar. It’s my ‘scoreboard’. “If I do this, I will get that” is the guiding process. Again, simple, but not necessarily easy. If it was, everyone would do it.

My action steps begin with a 16:8 intermittent fasting practice which means I fast – no food, no calories – from 7pm to 11am, 16 hours, and I eat 2 meals and one snack between 11am and 7pm. I have an 8-hour window for my meals and snack every day. In my fasted state, each morning, I exercise and move. I walk/jog between 4 to 5 15-minute miles, followed by 51 squats, and 20 side lunges at least 5 days a week. Additionally, I use free weights and my own body weight to do a 15-minute strength training for my upper body – shoulders, triceps, and biceps – to maintain muscle and create definition.

When I eat, my meals and snacks consist mainly of whole real foods, lots of fruits and vegetables, beans, whole grains, nuts & seeds, wild caught salmon and seafood and as much homemade food as possible. This includes homemade hummus, salad dressings and guacamole, an all time favorite staple, which I eat often! (check out my Instagram @jolene4kids)

I choose not to consume ultra-processed ‘stuff’. In other words, if a third grader can’t read the ingredient list on the bag or box, or you can’t tell what the ‘food’ is by the ingredient list, or it’s something my grandmother wouldn’t recognize, I don’t buy it and I don’t consume it. The experts in the health and longevity space will tell you it isn’t real food and it does real harm to the eight intracellular processes in the body. No, thank you. It’s a hard pass and a line I have drawn in my sand.

I am choosing less alcohol, less gluten and much less added sugar. I am enjoying more mocktails, whole grains, and the joy of fresh fruit. And my daily regimen definitely includes high quality, fair trade dark, dark chocolate!

Those are a few representative action steps toward my current SMART goal that are helping me move the needle and achieve progress. To date, I have lost 17lbs and have moved the needle from 156 to 139. I am now focused on going from 139 to 129, losing 10 more pounds by September 1, 2023. It is attainable and realistic and I am on track to achieve it. It will also contribute to my metabolic health and longevity.

How will I celebrate this accomplishment? (Celebration is very important to the success of your goal!) I will get to go ‘shopping’ in my very own closet (free new clothes!) and my husband and I are taking a two-week vacation to Ireland to celebrate our 42nd wedding anniversary later this summer!

Now it’s YOUR turn!! What is your highest priority and why? What would success look like, sound like, and feel like? What would you need to do to move the needle that you aren’t doing now? How would you celebrate your achievement? Remember, you are worth it! Taking care of self IS the highest priority, for when we have our health, we can have a thousand wishes. Dream big, my friend!

Thank you for choosing to take time, stop and read these thoughts today. I appreciate your time and genius. I hope something has resonated with you and helps you live an inspired life!

Up next week, highest priority #2! A sneak peek ~ it’s “simple”.

The Value of Beginning with Why

“People don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it.”

~Simon Sinek

Image by tess from Pixabay

“People don’t care what you know until they know you care.”

For 40 years I have had the opportunity to serve as a leader in the field of education. The first 10 years, I was a leader in a classroom, designing and facilitating learning experiences, creating an environment that communicated “you are welcome, safe and loved” and learning as much as I could so that first and fourth graders were well served. I loved going to ‘work’ every day, because I loved ‘my kids’.

From there, I got to move into an assistant principal’s role, and then a building principal. For the next 17 years I served as leader of an entire school community. It’s the best (and at times, the worst) job in education! I was the beneficiary of countless meaningful experiences and relationships. I loved every day, because I valued the hardworking staff who helped all of our students be successful, safe, nourished, and master-taught. I loved our students and their families and enjoyed being with them, serving as their dedicated and committed leader.

I then moved onto a new role as a leader of leaders and accepted an opportunity to design professional learning experiences for principals and teacher leaders. They were all impressive exemplars in the field and I was once again the beneficiary of rich and rewarding relationships and moments. That chapter closed with the amazing opportunity to serve as a leadership coach, coaching schools through a school improvement process to achieve better results. This may have been the leadership role that impacted me more than any. It really brought a new and unprecedented emphasis to my why’s. It was indeed inspiring ~ both the people and the work.

The thousands of people I’ve had the great fortune to work with in my career as an educator didn’t buy what I did, but they did buy why I did it. They knew why I did what I did, because I lived my why. My purpose as a leader in all those different roles was to connect with people, support their genius, believe in them, help them grow, and celebrate them! That was my purpose and everything I did was rooted in those five why’s.

In 2009 I watched a TEDx Talk by Simon Sinek titled, “How Great Leaders Inspire Action.” In 2010 I shared that video and his related book, “Start With Why”, with 40 principals who had joined a Principals Academy initiative I was leading. The content of his TED Talk and his book has inspired me ever since.

The most important action to take when creating something is to clearly define “why?” Why? Because that is the first question most people will ask. Curious and courageous people will ask out-loud; critics and skeptics will utter it to themselves. But everyone will always ask it. So it seems to make perfect sense to begin there.

For the past 15 months, since retiring from full time work I have spent countless hours contemplating and writing about my next chapter. It’s kind of a reset thing in life. Big life event = reset. A large piece of that contemplation was ‘what is my why now?’ What purpose do I want to serve ? I re-read Sinek’s book as well as “Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life,” by Francesc Mirales and Hector Garcia. Ikigai is, in translation, what gets you up and excited about each day. It resonated with me as another way to think about my why.

I found the process for defining why in a new chapter to be more a “backward design”. First, I actually had envisioned my goals for this new decade, life in my 60’s, and what means the most to me. I captured those ends in mind and titled them my seven highest priorities. Then I asked myself, ‘why are these my highest priorities?’ That led me to exploring what I value most at this point in life and I was able to provide definition to my whys.

Today, they are all very clear to me and I can articulate them with clarity and confidence. They were a necessary link for designing my action steps that will move me forward toward achieving my highest priorities.

Our why drives everything else which brings light once again to Simon Sinek’s wise recommendation to “start with why.” It determines what we say, do, feel, think, plan and what we say, do, feel, think and plan determines what results we will get. In this new chapter, I want even better results, different results, so I started with my whys. In next week’s post, I’ll be sharing my first of seven highest priorities, the why behind it, as well as the action steps I’ve designed for this year’s progress toward the related goal. I hope you will join me!

Who or what inspires you to be better? Why? What is your highest priority in this chapter? How do you know?

Thank you for stopping by and spending some of your precious time and energy to read my post today! I appreciate you and wish you kind and simple moments. Live inspired ~ on purpose!

Everybody’s Got a Dream…What’s YOUR Dream?

Of all the lines I have memorized from one of my favorite classic movies, “Pretty Woman”, this one still resonates with me, “Welcome to Hollywood!  What’s your dream?  Everybody’s got a dream!”whats-your-dream  (Of course, the “You work on commission, right?” still might be the best Pretty Woman quote of all time.  A great reference to karma, I suppose, and a reminder to be kind.  Always.)

As busy adults with busy lives we don’t often stop and ponder the answer to that question, what IS my dream?  Not only do we not stop to ponder our answer (or smell the roses), we rarely take time to create a plan to make those dreams come true.  They sort of just linger in the spaces we hurriedly pass by every day.  Nor do we take time to ask others, what’s your dream?  It’s a great question to ask kids.  They always have their dreams ready to pull out of their pocket.

As the result of a year long course I am taking (Simple Year), I have been focused on that very question, what are my dreams?  Simple Year has provided me the opportunity to enjoy self-directed learning around self-awareness and that process has led me to this revisit of life’s dreams.  The inspiration from our course instructors has compelled me toward this re-focus and re-definition of my life’s dreams.  Thank you, Courtney Carver at Be More with Less and Brooke McAlary at Slow Your Home.  (Yes, check them out….they are awesome!)

So here’s my dream, as it stands today.  I have always loved writing, but I never dreamed of being a writer.  The gift has served me well as an educator.  Word smithing has always been recognized as one of my greatest strengths by my colleagues.  I used it to write school newsletters and successful grant applications.  I used it to recognize stellar teachers in their annual performance assessments, and in hundreds of heartfelt notes of gratitude and annual Christmas cards.  But I never dreamed of being a writer.  Until now.  Until I fell in love with blogs as my go-to daily reading.  Until I read Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert.  And now my dream is to be a writer.  A blogger, more specifically. To be creative and create something using my gift of writing.  Thank you, Elizabeth Gilbert.  You’re awesome, too!

I dream about sharing ideas, connecting with human beings all over the world, and making a difference with those ideas and connections.  I also dream about simplifying my life, slowing down, developing a minimalist lifestyle, and spending more quality time with my family and closest friends.  Through my writing I hope to share this journey with others.

So that’s it.  That’s my dream. Everybody’s got a dream….what’s YOUR dream?  I would love to hear all about it!

 

 

The Benefits of True Collaborative Practice ~ How 1+1 can = 3 or Even More

FF-Jobs-Woz2So how might one distinguish between true collaborative practice and ‘working together’, and what might be the benefits of the first over the latter?

Dr. Covey’s Habit #6, Synergize, of the “7 Habits for Highly Effective People”, emphasizes the fact that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.  One plus one can equal three or more when people with different perspectives come together to utilize their diversity to create a third alternative that ultimately is far and wide better than an idea created from just one perspective.  One plus one could actually equal “immeasurable”, as is evidenced by the collaboration of Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak.

David Kelley, founder and chairman of the design company, IDEO, in Palo Alto, CA, believes in the power of “wild ideas” to promote successful design, along with an eclectic team of ‘designers’ who work from all different angles of a design project.

The legacy of the profession for a classroom teacher is one of working primarily in isolation.  For decades, teachers (and principals) have been planning and designing learning alone during their designated prep times.  Today’s students require learning that has been designed by ‘an eclectic team’ fueled by ‘wild ideas’ in a culture where true synergy is at work and collaboration is the only way business is conducted.  In other words, an example might be interdisciplinary units that emphasize creativity and innovation whereby students collaboratively construct a project or solution.

Moving from ‘working together’ to working with a collaborative approach requires vulnerability and the willingness to relinquish control.  These are difficult concepts for most people, but especially educators who have for years designed and delivered teaching behind a closed door, with just their students as participants.  How do we as a profession move toward a collaborative culture for designing learning in all schools so that all students benefit from more ideas, better designs, and innovative learning?

Perhaps we begin by modeling that very idea.  As leaders, we need to conscientiously build collaborative practice, honor the value in diverse perspectives, embrace the wild ideas (yes, get out of the box!), and stop expecting perfection.  Learning should be messy.  Designing learning should be messy too.  It has great benefits.